Saturday

Good morning, I have just returned from an early call-out at 5:30am this day. Water everywhere and it was. My response time was less than 15 min. and resolve water leak. My thoughts run true and wander about this early and that is the reason for this post. Actually, too, I need to write about yesterday, because I have somehow been keeping it bouncing around in repetitive thought.
The day ended up being an overall test of my patience and understanding of my own self and of others. Anger, justifiably, came to me suddenly and unexpected. There had been some tension between my self and this co-worker for some time and I have stood up to him already on occasion, always about him staying out of my way and leaving me alone. Knowing his nature is one of being "hater" and his incessant gossip and mild threats (I never took him serious, but not to would also leave me vulnerable to a perceived weakness, or lack of fortitude.) So anyway this Friday morning I overheard another loud declaration of "I should have ran him over last night when I saw him." He actually did not express this statement to anyone, he was trying, as always attempting to shock people for attention. His comments are never responsible and I should have never took him seriously, typically we all just ignore. But yesterday I responded with what I was interpreting as a threat toward my personal well-being and safety, because he statements have always been the day after I have seen him while I was riding my bike and him driving. I said somethings that explained my position.
Somehow there are other characters in all this especially one that has somehow relyed all his life on his boyish nature, which by now he has outgrown, and he obviously hijacked somebody else's character and assumed it as his own.
Well, I was able to place my self aside and recognize that I cannot get in the way of God's will and that I must offer myself as a friend and I did. In-Kind.

Thursday

Busy day and I started with a runny nose this morning and all day too. Any acts of kindness were with my actions and not so much with my words today. Too tired to focus on any one minute of my time other than I helped a coworker with $10 gas and lunch for a ride to my moonlighting job. Generous as it may be, because I wish I could give him more, but to do so would have rendered the intention and vibe off-kilter. I had some time with Grandpa today going to pick-up a new couch and recliner in a small town down the road.
Picked up #5 child today and we rode our bikes to dinner- Mexican Food. Finished homework and now I am doing my home work. Earlier I did play with taking up a drink again in my mind and I quickly replayed my last binge and shrugged it away.
Working toward my new Goal of buying a truck from my step-father. Thinking he only wanted $1500 the price has gone up since I asked about it today to $2000. The credit that I have sucks and I don't make much to pay off outright. All in good faith and doing the next right thing, "Living In-Kind".

Wednesday

Just up from a poor nights sleep. Actually I was moved with anxiousness and excitement, wanting more information from the World Wide Web. Searching countless pages on how to be a better human- HA!. Nooo, I was actually shopping on ebay :).
Half dosed, oops, I mean dozed this morning, I managed to listen a bit to some chatter on the radio about Obamma's State of the Union speech, about "Working Together". Catchy suggestion I only wish with my uncanny ability of hindsight, wish the idea took off a little bit sooner in our young American history, preferably around 1776 and to include all the inhabitants here-in. Two Hundred or so years later and we are just now negotiating this profound idea of "Working Together"- to include all inhabitants there-in.
Well it is getting a bit late for me, Today was good overall. Stayed busy all day and did not try to create S***! for anybody. Nothing much else to say other than I wish I could get off of ebay for one day.

Tuesday

While in the shower i was thinking on ideas that would help my relationship with some of my immediate subjects(persons whom I must mend relations[working]). Many are good ones, if I could only come up with my own original method(s) of solution. Honest and sincere is the path I wish to take, not brutal or bull-sh**, just what I wish to express inside as virtuous.
I believe that we are all capable of kindness, me too, and we all seem to want to give it but for me I am wrapped up insecurity and fear, I know.
Well, I am back in my room at 10:42P.M. and tiredly typing away. I've made two attempts today with two different co-workers; actually all of them. I believe that I must give my self goals for doing so.

Monday

It is about 11:30 P.M. and am winding down from a long day. There is just too much to type out tonight, but I have managed to learn about living today in-kind.
Worked well with others today except that I was guilty for talking bad about someone else at work without their immediate knowledge. Tomorrow I will greet some people at work with whom I have no desire. I must overcome my shortcomings and pride must be placed aside to let good will prevail.
I helped #5 child plant a "School Cabbage" for a potential $1000 prize, all for him. Fed the animals and helped my neighbor lay some peel-n-stick tile and then made breakfast for dinner.
My key lesson today was to never fix with a watch that is not broke, especially so when I am not a horologist (look this up it is a word associated with time). I'll stick with collecting them and when I acquire the right tools and patience, then  I may fix a watch that does not need fixing. I guess too this somewhat simple analogy(?) could be applied to person to person interaction as well? Thinking to much about the thoughts, motives, and actions; then trying to tinker or worry about them could be similar to a watch of 21 jewels. Who knows! Good Night!

How to become living?

What a questionable statement! Well, I have already hesitated with my thoughts and words. Now, my grammar too (flash back to elementary school). Slept well last night and had some interesting dreams, all situational and in large cities. Woke up #5 (10 year old son) the 5th of my clan and fed my dog and feral cat. Been sober since 10/23/10 and have been adjusting to living well, this time. "This Time", seems to be a recurring theme in my struggle for inner peace and acceptance (own self). Meetings, books, and meditation have been my new vent.
Work went well today. My son #5 came to my house instead of his mother's place, he is out playing with the neighborhood kids. I feel blank headed and aquured

Introduction to "Living In-Kind" BLOG.

Living:

having life; being alive; not dead: living persons.

In-Kind:

paid or given in goods, commodities, or services instead of money: in-kind welfare programs.

paying or returning something of the same kind as that received or offered.

 I would like to express also that "in-kind" be related to Human attributes of kindness which involve unselfish acts or utterance. This blog may at times include all aspects of human living and most-times personal experiences toward being(working at it) a better human. All names will and/or places be changed for obvious reason of law and general overall respect for our fellow human acquaintance(s).